he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We left the knife in your bed.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
