i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
