mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
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