Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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