mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
