those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I don't think brook has ever known best
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
