I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize