shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
