So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
