It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
