I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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