Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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