it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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