if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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