i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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