I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
