Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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