if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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