If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
