Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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