Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
