So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boob is missing a layer of skin
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize