That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
