when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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