her vagine was all disorganized.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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