ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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