So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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