Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
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I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
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female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets