Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My ATM looks so different sober.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us