best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.