I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
4 words: hood of his car
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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