But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
My pussy is not your playground.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
