Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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