Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
