I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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