so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
