Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"

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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(209): View more from California

you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...

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(443): View more from Maryland

we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.

(1-702): View more from Nevada

I regret nothing

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(734): View more from Michigan

P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.

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