You're completely useless in the revolution.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
