The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
