it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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