Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
