I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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