We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
