should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
