Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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