we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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