She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
