Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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