break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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