I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I didn't notice because vodka
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
