Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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