How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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