My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
